"Dear Jesus", he wrote. "If I get a red wagon for Christmas, I won't fight with my brother Peter for a year." Then Johnny thought, "Oh, no, Peter is such a brat, I could never, ever keep that promise." So Johnny threw away the letter and started again.
"Dear Jesus, if I get a red wagon for Christmas, I will eat all my vegetables for a year." Then Johnny thought, "Oh, no, that means spinach, broccoli and asparagus. Yuck! I could never ever keep that promise."
Suddenly Johnny had an idea. He went downstairs to the living room. From the mantel above the fireplace, he grabbed the family's statue of the Virgin Mary (Johnny grew up in a Catholic family). Taking the statue to the kitchen he wrapped it in newspaper and stuffed it into a grocery bag. He took the bag upstairs to his room, opened the closet and placed the package in the farthest, darkest corner. He closed the closet door.
He then took a new sheet of paper and wrote, "Dear Jesus, if you ever want to see your mother again ..."