Mark Conner's Space

The Social Media Revolution

Click here to watch an educational video on the growing impact of social media.

Here are just a few statistics: 

• By 2010, Gen Y will outnumber Baby Boomers
• 96% of them have joined a social network
• 1 out of 8 couples married in the US last year have met via social media
• Facebook added 100 million users in 9 months
• If Facebook would be a country, it would be the world's 4th largest
• 80% of companies are using LinkedIn as their primary tool to find employees
• 80% of Twitter usage is on mobile devices. People update anywhere, anytime. Imagine what that means for bad customer experiences?
• In 2009, Boston College stopped distributing e-mail addresses to incoming freshmen
• YouTube is the 2nd largest search engine in the world
• There are over 200,000,000 Blogs. 54% of bloggers post content or tweet daily.

Could this be bigger than the Industrial Revolution?

 

Star Gazing

I have always loved the night sky. The array of stars and planets, and even our own moon, make for fun gazing. I remember as a kid driving out in the country and being stunned at how bright the sky can be.

David wrote about this in Psalm 8 ...

When I look at the night sky and see the work of your fingers — the moon and the stars you set in place — what are people that you should think about them, mere mortals that you should care for them? Yet you made them only a little lower than God and crowned them with glory and honor. [Psalm 8:3-5. NLT]

A few years ago my wife bought me a telescope from an on-line auction and I'm just getting into using it a bit more. We live a little further out of town now so the night sky is brighter than what it is in suburbia. You can even see a great deal with the naked eye and even more with a basic pair of binoculars.

There is an excellent computer program called Stellarium for those who like to learn a bit more about the night sky. You can download it here for free. Click here to access a web site which is a good beginner's guide to astronomy.

The Lord counts the stars and calls them all by name. How great is our Lord! His power is absolute! His understanding is beyond comprehension! NLT [Psalm 147:4-5]

 

Healing (Pt.3)

What About Those Who Aren't Healed?

Every human being has been born in sin, and all of us are suffering the effects of the curse of sin. The ultimate effect of sin is death. This is the last enemy to be destroyed (1Cor.15:21-28). Jesus died to redeem us from sin, sickness and death (Gal.3:13). It is important, however, to understand the kingdom theology of the 'already' and the 'not yet' [refer to the writings of George Elton Ladd and Gordon Fee].

* 'Already' sin has been atoned for but 'not yet' do we see sin completely eradicated from the world or our lives.

* 'Already' death has been defeated but 'not yet' do we see death totally destroyed.

* 'Already' sickness has been taken by Jesus himself, but 'not yet' do we see sickness totally removed from the earth or our lives.

* 'Already' Satan is a defeated foe, but 'not yet' do we see his final punishment and judgment.

The second coming of Jesus will complete and finalise all that Jesus began at his first coming. Then there will be an age without sin, sickness, suffering, death or Satan's opposition.

Right now we are all getting older (graying, less agile, more frail, etc). Unless the Lord comes back in our lifetime (which he may), we will all die of something. The heart will stop beating sometime. Only the final generation will escape death in this life (1Thess.4:15-18). However, in reality, for the believer, death is ultimate healing! To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. Also, healing is not permanent. As far as we know, all people whom Jesus Himself healed eventually died.

Sometimes God heals and sometimes He does not. Jesus did not heal everybody. No person can give any fixed answers as to why. Only God Himself knows. He does what He does because He is God.Our responsibility is to pray and ask God to heal and help us (Jas.5:13-16), then to trust God with the outcome. Our attitude is not one of fatalism (“What will be, will be”), but one of faith (“We trust You, Lord, whether you deliver or not!”). When it comes to healing, let's have the attitude of the three Hebrew children who were facing a fiery furnance - "God is able to heal ... God will heal ... but even if not, we will still serve him (Dan.3:17-18)!"

P.S. For further helpful teaching on the subject of healing, I highly recommend the book Power Healing by John Wimber.

Healing (Pt.2)

Praying for Healing

All believers are called to pray for the sick. Here are some principles (not formulas) for praying for the sick.

1. Ask questions about the person’s need. Ask, “Where does it hurt?” or “What do you want me to pray for?” This is not a medical interview in which we probe for medical history or technical details. It simply helps us to know what the need is and how we should pray. Even Jesus never made assumptions about what a person wanted from him. To a blind man he said, “What do you want me to do for you?” (Mark 10:46-52). Other questions might include “Are you in pain right now?”, “How long have you had this?” or “Have you seen a doctor or specialist and if so, what did they say?”

2. Try to discern any root cause of the sickness. This next step is to clarify the root of the person’s problem. It asks, “Why does this person have this condition?” This determines the type of prayer needed to bring healing. We must also look beyond the natural surface reasons and be open to God giving us revelation through the word of wisdom, word of knowledge or the discerning of spirits. Symptoms in one area of our lives may be caused by problems in other areas. Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s leading and insights. Of course, don’t go overboard and try to probe to deep unnecessarily.

3. Choose an appropriate prayer. This step answers the question, “What kind of prayer is needed to help this person?” We must seek to know God’s specific will in the situation. This is the source of our confidence (1 John 5:14-15). There are two basic types of prayer: (a) Prayer directed toward God (intercession). Intercessory prayer involves you going between them and God out of deep concern for the person. We stand before God and ask for the person’s healing. Prayers should be simple and straightforward - “Lord, I ask you to heal John of this condition.” In some cases, you may want to get the person to pray for themselves. This is especially important in areas of unforgiveness and bitterness. (b) Prayer directed to a condition or sickness based on words from God (command). Jesus often used the authoritative word when healing people (Mark 9:25). We have been given power to break bondages and release God’s blessing (Matt. 16:19). We can declare or announce the truth of God’s Word. For example, you might pray, “I break the power of this condition in the name of Jesus.” Prayers like this are usually very short yet effective.

4. Pray in faith. Pray in faith, believing that something is going to happen when you pray for them – physically (immediately or gradually), emotionally (strength, comfort, joy) and spiritually (close to God, trust). Have an attitude of faith, hope and love. Lay hands on them (don’t push or lay your hands heavily on anyone), pray and possibly anoint them with oil (Jam.5:14 and Mark 6:13). Be sensitive to the person and the Holy Spirit. Be aware of your hand motions, tone of voice and volume of speech. Don’t do anything that would distract the person being prayed for or others nearby.

5. Check for any improvement or change. As you’re praying, watch to see what is happening in the person. Ask further questions to see what God is doing and if there has been any change. Ask them how they are feeling or if anything has happened. Pray again if necessary. Some people get completely better, others show considerable improvement, others some improvement and others none at all. Not all healing is instantaneous (see Mark 8:22-26; 5:8). Even Jesus prayed twice for a blind man to be healed. Jesus’ promise to believers is that the sick will get well or "recover” (Mk.16:19). At times this may be gradually. When people are not healed, reassure them that God loves them and encourage them to seek more prayer. Divine healing is sometimes a process.

6. If appropriate, follow up the person later. You may want to: ask them to get back with you as to how they are; refer them to someone else for further help; encourage them to continue to seek prayer; encourage them to continue to look to God for their healing; encourage them to get some medical advice.

Through God’s love and wisdom, we can be used to bring tremendous blessing to people’s lives. Not everyone who is prayed for is healed (see 2 Kings 13:14 and 2 Tim.4:20, two verses I've never heard a sermon on). However, virtually everyone who receives prayer is helped in one or another. Ministering Christ’s loving compassion is just as important as healing itself.

[Tomorrow - What if someone isn't healed?]

Healing (Pt.1)

Any visit to a hospital is a vivid reminder of how many people in our world struggle with sickness and suffering every day. The affects of The Fall are evident all around us.

So what about healing? God obviously still heals today but many people, including Christians, struggle with sickness. What's up with all of this? Here are a few thoughts on this important subject.

The Bible and Healing

When it comes to healing, we must begin with an accurate understanding of God’s character and nature. The Bible teaches us that, when it comes to our need, God knows (Prov.15:11. Psalm 139:1-10), God cares (Ex.34:6-7. 1 Pet.5:7), God is able to help (Jer.32:17, 27. Matt.19:26), and God is willing to help (Matt.8:2).

In response to this, there are three different camps in the Christian community:

1. “God knows, cares and is able but is not willing. This is not the time or the age;”

2. “God knows, cares and is able and always willing to heal you. If you’re sick and you’re not well, if you have a physical need and you’re not healed it’s because you lack faith. It’s always God’s will to heal and so there is something wrong with you if you aren’t;”

3. “God knows, cares and is able and is willing unless he has a higher purpose.”

The first camp (called “Cessasionists”) are strongly Biblical, but keep God in a box, in that they don’t believe that God still heals or does miracles today. The second camp (extreme “faith” teaching) has the strength of faith but the weakness of always putting God in a box to move a certain way without exception. The third camp has the strength of “balance” but must avoid a fatalistic attitude of “whatever will be, will be”. Our responsibility is to pray and ask God to heal and help us (Jas.5:13-16), then to trust God with the outcome.

The Bible teaches that God’s will for our life, generally speaking, is “health” (See Ex.15:26; 23:25. Psalm 103:1-3; 107:17-20. Prov.4:20-22. Is.53:4-5. Matt.8:16-17. 1 Pet.2:24). God’s provision is complete. He has done all that we need for life and godliness. He has made provision for our wholeness – spirit, soul and body. God desires health and wholeness for each one of us, as we walk in obedience to Him, so we can fulfil our life purpose.

However, like salvation, good health is not automatic. There are things we need to do to position ourselves to have the greatest possibility of good health. We need to have faith in God as our healer (Hos.4:6. John 8:32. Heb.11:6), obey his commands (Deut.28:58-60), maintain a healthy diet (Ex.16. 1Tim.4:4-5. Lev.11. Deut.14), exercise, rest and relax regularly (1Tim.4:8. Matt.11:28-30), and deal quickly with negative emotions (Eph.4:27-31. 1Cor.11:28-31. Matt.5:23-24).

There is no set pattern or formula in the Bible for healing. For instance, blind Bartemaus called out to Jesus and Jesus simply spoke to him and he was healed (Mark 10:46-52). Another blind man was not instantly healed. Jesus took mud and saliva, mixed it together and put it on his eye. As he went his way and did what he was told (“go and wash in the pool of Siloam”), he was healed. God’s healing power and anointing fell on a natural substance and flowed through it (John 9:1-12).

We can conclude that, “The pathway of healing that God has for you may be different from the one he has for someone else though you may have similar health problems.” Also, “At times God’s healing is spontaneous and instantaneous. Other times healing is a process and requires patience and perseverance as our healing is gradually manifested.” It could be an instant answer to prayer, a radical change of diet, a change of lifestyle or even a medical operation. If you are sick, pray for God’s direction, believe God’s promises to you from His Word, have others pray for you and talk to a reputable doctor.

We need a balance of faith (God’s part) and wisdom (our part). We should avoid extremes in either direction – having only wisdom (no faith) or only faith (no wisdom). lack of wisdom can be very dangerous. There are many sad stories of families with a loved one with a terminal illness who never even considered or talked about the possibility of death. Anyone with a terminal illness needs to exercise wisdom and talk about it with their family and loved ones. Then continue to believe God in faith for your healing. This is not unbelief, but it can save a lot of hurt and disappointment.

Also, prayer for healing does not make doctors and nurses obsolete. Sometimes natural means are appropriate (see 1 Tim.5:23), sometimes God chooses to heal miraculously, sometimes he doesn't and we often aren't sure why.

[Tomorrow - Praying for Healing]

Avatar

A few weeks ago, I went with my family to see Avatar, James Cameron's sci-fi epic - in 3D. What a cinema experience it was. The graphics and special effects are amazing. No doubt this is a huge step forward in movie-making, similar to what happened when The Matrix was releasedback in 1999, with its slow motion action scenes. Avatar is now the highest grossing film of all time.

Some Christians have jumped on the overt neo-paganism spirituality of the movie. I can see where they are coming from. Others have taken a more balanced approach. I can see where they are coming from too. in his book, Reel Spirituality: Theology and Film in Dialogue Robert K. Johnston shows us that we can see the fingerprints of God in all of culture - including art, film and literature.

On the positive side, I thought the film had a strong creation care theme, which is something we need to talk more about. It was also a story of redemption - laying down your life for the benefit of others. I like that too.

2010 Global Atheist Convention

Last week I had a call from a newspaper reporter asking if I was worried that the 2010 Global Atheist Convention to be held in Melbourne was sold out. I said, "Of course not." People of faith have nothing to fear in doubt or skepticism. No need to picket or boycott events such as this (though some Christians are seeking to take action about it). I believe that dialogue and discussion can be helpful in all areas of belief.

One of the main speakers is Richard Dawkins, one of the world's most influential atheists. I have read his book The God Delusionand it only strengthened my faith. It is written in very emotional language and he makes sweeping generalisations about religion and faith that can't be validated. In no way did it shake my faith or give reasonable objections to the classic reasons for believing that there is a God (see my previous posts on this topic here).

Yes, a lot of damage has been done throughout history in the name of Christ - but never in the spirit of Christ. But let's not forget the incredible good that has also been done through people of faith in every sector society - education, health, arts and literature, family, business, welfare and government.

I think that Dawkins should model a little more of the tolerance he promotes, rather than being such a militant atheist trying to eradicate everyone else's belief.

P.S. Melanie Phillips has a good article in The Australian worth reading.

How to Make Wise Decisions (Pt.6)

A few final comments on guidance and the will of God ...

God never guides by part of his navigation system alone, always by all of them. They are like lights that need lining up. God established the principle of 2 or 3 witnesses (see Deut.17:6. 2 Cor.13:1). Not one of these principles works alone.

This is the law of witness. You don’t violate God’s word to do his will. He knows how to confirm. Green lights and only one red one? Wait. Be still. Don’t be stupid.

The bigger the decision, the larger the risk, the more witnesses you need lined up. Take your time. Don’t be hasty.

Consider (1) what the Scriptures say, (2) observe what the circumstances are saying, (3) listen to the inner voice of the Spirit, (4) be open to supernatural guidance, (5) and use wisdom.

Most errors occur when you make too much of one of these principles. Overemphasis will kill you. There is not ONE key to knowing the whole will of God or making wise decisions. Make sure things are in agreement. Don’t move until they are.

Balanced guidance has both an objective and a subjective dimension. Those who are more logical thinkers need to open up to more special revelation and the guidance of the Spirit. Those who are more emotional feelers need to open up to more of God’s word and the gaining of wisdom.

Don't buy into a fatalistic view of God's will. Don't allow negativity or frustration to take a hold of your life. Keep in step with the Spirit and walk forward dependently yet boldly as you live out God's will for your life. You can do it!

How to Make Wise Decisions (Pt.5)

A final aspect of how God guides us is ...

5. Wisdom.

God created wisdom before he created the world (Prov.8). In the book of Proverbs, we are encouraged, if not urged, to get wisdom. God wants to help us develop wisdom, which is the proper application of knowledge and understanding (Prov.4:7). God gave us a brain – we must use it. He won’t make all the decisions for us. He wants us to use common sense, which isn’t so common any more.

Ask God for wisdom (Jas.1:5), look in the Bible for it, do personal research and listen to wise counselors or advisers. Wise planning and thinking ahead before making decisions is a Biblical concept.In order to make good decisions, you need to be able to think clearly and weigh up the evidence effectively. Here is a simple four-stage decision-making process:

a. The Question. State the decision or the problem as a clear question. Know exactly what the decision you need to make is, what the issue or problem is. This is the foundation stage - understand the background of your situation. Ask key questions.

b. The Alternatives.Think about and come up with as many creative alternatives as possible that answer the question. List all your options. Be creative and avoid judgment at this stage. Get help and feedback from people with knowledge of the subject, skill, experience, responsibility, strength of calling and principle. 

c. The Consequences. Evaluate each alternative by thinking through their implications and predicting the likely, as well as the possible, consequences. This prepares you to make a decision and also creates some contingency plans in case the choice proves to partially or totally wrong. Weigh up the advantages (pluses) and disadvantages (minuses) of the different alternatives. Gather and sift through as much information as possible. Think about your choices. Think about each option. Think beyond the decision to any potential “chain reactions” (Prov.22:3).

Get counsel and input from other people (see Prov.12:15; 13:10; 15:22; 19:20; 20:18). No one has all the wisdom. In the multitude of counsel there is wisdom and safety. Get more than one. Major decisions – do you speak to wise people about it first? Approval of those God has put in your life. Get multiple opinions.

Observe your own feelings. What are you “comfortable” with? What seems “good”? Go slowly on this step and take your feelings seriously (not just other people’s). The peace of God is to rule in your heart and mind (Phil.4:6-7). Don’t do anything you feel unsettled about it that violates your conscience. Our conscience gives us a sense of right and wrong. It is most effective when we have invested God’s word into our minds.

Do a quick check at this point: Have you asked the right question? Have all credible alternatives been considered? Have all possible consequences for each alternative been thought through? Have all foreseeable contingencies been provided for, as far as possible?

d. The Decision. Use your best judgment to make a decision. Discard the other options. No backtracking. Avoid going back again and again to step 3 and delaying the decision. Don’t expect the feeling to come first, and the decision to follow. Its time to move ahead now. 

Commit to the decision. It is rarely possible to make the perfect decision”. Every course of action will lead to more choices and will throw up some unexpected difficulties. If you are too worried about the pursuit of the perfect decision, you will be more likely to become painfully indecisive.

Indecision ruins many people’s potential and causes costly delays. Many of us freeze when faced with decisions. We’re afraid of making the wrong choice. We tend to be abdicators not decision-makers. This results in lost opportunities, endless procrastination, frustration and doubt.

In few instances is one decision better than another. It is usually the decision-maker, not the choice itself, that makes it work. Any failure has little to do with the choice. It is directly related to lack of dedicated commitment. Choices are often good only if we make them good.

Do everything to make the decision work. Other decisions might have worked just as well, but be loyal and optimistic to the one you’ve chosen. Don’t abandon the decision at signs of difficulty and become pessimistic about the choice.

[A few final thoughts tomorrow]

How to Make Wise Decisions (Pt.4)

How does God guide us? What is his navigation system for our life? So far we have looked at the Scriptures and circumstances. Let's discuss a few more today ...

3. The inner witness of the Holy Spirit.

God has sent the Holy Spirit to guide us and lead us. We should pray and commit all of our ways to the Lord, asking for his guidance and direction. God wants to reveal His thoughts and feelings to us. He does this through His Word but also through the person of the Holy Spirit. He has been sent to be our friend and our helper (see Rom.8:14. 1 Jn.2:20,27).

God led the Israelites through the external means of a cloud by day and a fire by night symbolising the Holy Spirit. Pretty simple, just watch the cloud. When it’s moving, get a move on! Other decisions were made with the Urim and Thummin in the priest’s breastplate. God would give an indication of “Yes” or “No” when a question was asked. We now have an inner witness of the Spirit to guide us ... if we'll only listen.

4. The supernatural.

God sometimes uses "special revelation" to guide and direct us. This could include prophecy, which is primarily given for strengthening, encouragement and comfort (1 Cor.14:3). Be careful of directive prophecy. You don’t get the will of God from a prophecy only. God does not lead you by one sign. You need to test the word. Get some more confirmation. Who knows whether the prophet is right and the word? Check it out. Paul had a prophecy from Agabus but did not let it turn him from what God had already spoken to him about (Acts 21:10-15).

God also speaks at times through dreams and visions, and occasionally through an audible voice or through angels (but never contrary to God's word - see Gal.1:8).

[More tomorrow]

How to Make Wise Decisions (Pt.3)

God does guide us. His will is good, pleasing and perfect. He wants us to find it and fulfill it. We need to adopt a proper attitude and perspective on God’s will for your life. Don’t be fatalistic, negative or frustrated. Don’t give up or get mystical. Learn to make wise decisions. Decisions determine destiny.

So, how does God lead his people? What is his navigation system? Let's look at a few components of how God guides us:

1. The Scriptures.

God’s Word contains God’s will. As we read and meditate on the Scriptures, we will begin to think like God thinks and act like he acts. No other means of guidance should contradict the inerrant Word of God. Nothing he calls you to do will contradict the Word. [See Ps.119:89, 105. Matt.4:4; 24:35. Jn.17:17] God’s word is compared to light and it leads us a step of a time on our journey. He gives us just enough light to make the next step.

Success was guaranteed for those who meditated upon and obeyed God’s commands and principles for life (see Josh.1:8. Ps.1. 2 Tim.3:16-17). God’s word contains principles for every area of our life. There are warnings to be heeded and characters to be studied. There are narratives (records of God’s works and ways), segments of wisdom literature, songs of praise and worship, prophetic messages, teaching and instruction (of Jesus and the early church leaders). God's people are often destroyed through lack of knowledge (Hosea 4:6). Don't ignore God's instruction manual for life or just refer to it when things aren't working properly.

2. Circumstances.

Circumstances define the context of every decision. God can use circumstances to direct us, but never by themselves. Don’t let circumstances alone dictate your decision. It’s one way of guidance. You can’t be led by it alone.

Open doors are God-given opportunities for service … not always specific guidance from God requiring you to enter. Is there a fire in house? Move! have you lost your job? Look elsewhere.

What about "fleeces?" God allowed Gideon to do this because of his fear and lack of faith in what God had already told him.

God is in control and he will orchestrate circumstances to be a part of the guidance He gives us.

[More tomorrow]

How to Make Wise Decisions (Pt.2)

Let's continue speaking about a number of wrong approaches to knowing and doing God's will.

3. Frustration.

God’s will is not meant to be complicated or confusing. Yet sometimes we can feel like, "God loves me and has a wonderful plan for my life, but He’s not telling me!" God’s will is not some secret formula you need to discover.

Sometime our frustration is based on the belief that God has a detailed plan for our life that he has hidden and that we need to discover. We think we must try to find the next step that he wants us to take every moment of the day so as to not please him. Is God's will a circle in which we need to find the "dot" in the middle in order to be in the very "centre of His will?" Does God have a perfect plan for every one of our decisions, which we need to discover?  

Let’s look at Adam and Eve. God gave them one commandment – "Don’t eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil." He them gave them the freedom to eat of any of the other trees in the garden. One “No” and dozens of “Yes’s” (see Gen.2:15-17). God defined clear boundaries, then gave them the freedom to live within them. Adam and Eve were also free to daily decide their work and activity focused on the overall objectives given to them by God ("take care of the garden and take dominion over the earth").

The Bible indicates that God has a general purpose and plan for our lives, which he communicates to us. He also communicates any limitations or areas that are restricted to us. Within these parameters, we are free to choose what we want to do.

There is much more freedom in God’s will than we often realise. More often than not, there are many options we could choose from, all of which are in God’s will. God’s will is more of a relationship than a set of rules or guidelines. He gives us a compass rather than a detailed road-map. It is "dynamic" and ever changing rather than a "closed system." He allows for our failures and our mistakes. We need to focus on God not just on guidance.

Without this understanding, multiple options produce a lot of fear and frustration at "missing the dot" rather than gratitude for more than one opportunity. It also results in costly delays because of uncertainty about God’s specific will.

Parents have general desires for their children and they direct them in ways that are right. But they don’t have a detailed plan for every aspect of their children's life. That would breed immaturity rather than maturity.

Consider these choices: what to eat for lunch today, where to live, which house to buy, which job to take, which career to take, or which person to marry. Except for the clear prohibitions of Scripture, you are free to choose based on the desires of your heart and the wisdom available to you. If God has something specific in mind, then He will guide us toward it clearly.

The right question may be, "How do I make wise decisions?" rather than "How do I find the will of God?"

[More tomorrow]

How to Make Wise Decisions (Pt.1)

One of the most common questions I have been asked over the years is, "How do I know God's will for my life?" Many people struggle to know God's will and, as a result, find it difficult to make life decisions. The truth is that God does have a will - a sense of purpose. He has intentions and desires, thoughts and plans. He is not aimless or wondering what to do next.

The good news is that God wants us to know and do his will (see Eph.5:15-17. Col.1:9). He does not want to hide it from us. Finding God’s will is not meant to be hard. God wants to lead us and guide us in our lives (see Ps.25:4-5; 48:14; 73:24. Prov.6:20-22. Is.42:16; 48:17; 49:10; 57:18; 58:11. Jn.10:27. Rom.8:14).

However, finding and living in God’s will can seem confusing, hard and frustrating at times. It can be a struggle. Often this is because of wrong attitudes or misconceptions that we have about God’s will. Let’s look at some of them.

1. Fatalism.

This view over-emphasises the sovereignty of God and downplays human responsibility. It denies or minimises the fact that we have a choice and are therefore responsible for our lives.

Yes, there are things beyond our control either caused by God or other people. But we don’t have to be victims of the circumstances or other people’s choices. We are responsible beings. We are responsible for the choices we make and the consequences of those choices.

Don't just resign yourself to God’s will, assuming that it will happen anyway. This is unfair to God, as he often gets the blame for a lot of things he didn’t will or choose. Isn't it interesting how some people refer to catastrophes as "acts of God." Of course, when good things happen, those same people call it "good luck."

Fatalism is also unhealthy for you. You become simply a puppet on a string with no responsibility or life of your own. The truth is that God’s will involves your choice. God’s gift to you is your freedom to choose. He wants us to become mature. A parent who makes all the decisions for their child dooms the child to immaturity. Maturity is when we make our own wise decisions. We can't just sit around, inactive  and apathetic. We must rise up and be who God wants us to be.

2. Negativity.

Some people believe that God’s will is meant to make us miserable and depressed. He might make you marry someone you don’t like or send you somewhere you don’t want to go - maybe some deep dark cannibal-infested jungle. No, God’s plans are good and for our benefit (see Jer.29:11).

Don’t think that God has favourites who always get the good jobs and that you’ve been given an uninteresting insignificant leftover role. God’s will is good, pleasing and perfect (Rom.12:1-2). God’s will is an expression of his love. He knows more about what will fulfil us and make us happy than we do. Yes, there will be both problems and challenges. That's part of everyone's journey, even when we are living in God' s will. 

[Cont'd tomorrow]

Billy Graham's Suit

Here is an inspiring story about Billy Graham that was recently passed on to me.

Billy Graham is now 90 years old with Parkinson’s disease.

In January 2000, leaders in Charlotte, North Carolina,  invited their favorite son, Billy Graham, to a luncheon in his honor.

Billy initially hesitated to accept the invitation because he struggles with Parkinson’s disease. But the Charlotte  leaders said, ‘We don’t expect a major address. Just  come and let us honor you.’ So he agreed..

After wonderful things were said about him, Dr. Graham  stepped to the rostrum, looked at the crowd, and said,  ‘I’m reminded today of Albert Einstein, the great physicist who  this month has been honored by Time magazine as the  Man of the Century. Einstein was once traveling from  Princeton on a train when the conductor came down the  aisle, punching the tickets of every passenger. When he  came to Einstein, Einstein reached in his vest pocket. He  couldn’t find his ticket, so he reached in his trouser pockets.  It wasn’t there, so he looked in his briefcase but couldn’t find it.  Then he looked in the seat beside him. He still couldn’t find it.

The conductor said, ‘Dr. Einstein, I know who you are.  We all know who you are. I’m sure you bought a ticket.  Don’t worry about it.’

Einstein nodded appreciatively. The conductor continued  down the aisle punching tickets. As he was ready to  move to the next car, he turned around and saw the great  physicist down on his hands and knees looking under his  seat for his ticket.

The conductor rushed back and said, ‘Dr. Einstein,  Dr. Einstein, don’t worry, I know who you are No problem.  You don’t need a ticket.  I’m sure you bought one.’

Einstein looked at him and said, ‘Young man, I too, know who I am.  What I don’t know is where I’m going.”

Having said that Billy Graham continued, ‘See the suit I’m wearing? It’s a brand new suit. My children, and my grandchildren are telling me I’ve gotten a little slovenly in my old age. I used to be a bit more fastidious. So I went out and bought a new suit for this  luncheon and one more occasion.

You know what that occasion is? This is the suit in which I’ll be buried. But when you hear I’m dead, I don’t want  you to immediately remember the suit I’m wearing.  I want you to remember this:

I not only know who I am .. I also know where I’m going.’

Connecting Skills - 7. The Art of Encouragement

Jesus was a great encourager. He was always lifting people up and inspiring them towards God’s purpose for their lives. We see this in the Gospels but also in the book of Acts where Jesus appears to Paul in a dream or vision a number of times to encourage him during times of pressure and difficulty.

Most of your best friends are those who encourage you. You don't have many strong relationships with those who pull you down. You avoid these people and seek out those who believe in you and lift you up.

Everyone needs and responds to encouragement. People do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than under a spirit of criticism. Encouragement brings out the best in people. The way to truly motivate and develop people is through encouragement and through believing in them. People tend to become what the most important people in their lives think they will become.

Encouragement helps us rise above difficult situations. Words of encouragement have great power. Trouble and trial don't destroy people, only the lack of care and encouragement during those times. When it is there, it gives us the energy to go through.

Here is what the author of the book of Hebrews says ...

Heb.10:24-25. Make opportunities to encourage others by meeting together, consider ways in which you can encourage and continue doing it.

Who can you encourage today?

Connecting Skills - 6. The Art of Loving Confrontation

Jesus took time to lovingly confront people when they needed it – his disciples, the religious leaders, and the crowd.

We all have blind spots – things about us that we don’t see. We need others to show us these areas and help us to grow and change. The apostle Paul tells us to learn to ‘speak the truth in love’ to one another (Eph.4:15). We all need truth-tellers. The truth can set us free. Some people speak the truth but not in a loving manner while others are so loving that they never speak the truth.

We all need to be lovingly assertive, when appropriate. Avoid being overly assertive which leads to aggression. Avoid being under-assertive, allowing people to walk all over you.

Confrontation is not easy. In fact, it can be very difficult. We all fear being disliked. We may be afraid of making things worse. However, usually it is the attitude in which you confront that makes things worse, not the confrontation itself. We may fear rejection. We may find it difficult to share our feelings. We may think that confrontation will destroy love and trust. Actually, if done correctly, confrontation can build more love and trust into the relationship.

We can confront without hurting. We must not hang on to our anger and hurt. We need to take responsibility for our feelings. Share your feelings and thoughts honestly and openly. Always seek to maintain the relationship. Have the courage and the consideration to confront lovingly.

Assertiveness and confrontation always need to be done with the right spirit. We should not be either overeager or too hesitant to confront. We should confront, not because it makes us feel good, but because we are committed to the quality of our relationships. Confronting with the right spirit comes out of having the right goal in your confrontation.

Is there someone you need to have an open and honest conversation with? Don't leave it any longer. Ask God for wisdom to speak the truth in love ... as soon as you can. I think you'll be glad you did.