Mark Conner's Space

BLOG Update

Hi everyone ...

My family and I will be taking some holidays during January. I have scheduled regular posts for the blog so there'll be lots of good content coming your way, at least every few days. This includes ten great questions to ask yourself as you start another year.

Because I'll be taking some time off, I won't be able to answer comments on the blog so I have turned this function off just for this month.

Take care and God bless you!

Mark Conner

P.S. Some blog trivia ... since starting the blog just over a year ago there have been ...

417 posts

1664 comments

over 225,000 page views

an average of almost 460 page views per day

Thanks for your encouragement and support with the blog :)

Christmas Day

I pray that each one of you have an enjoyable Christmas Day celebration time and a refreshing and relaxing holiday season.

I've enjoyed blogging and interacting with so many of you on a variety of issues and topics. Thanks for a good year!

 

"For a child is born to us, a son is given to us. The government will rest on his shoulders. And he will be called: Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." [Isaiah 9:6. NLT]

 

A Drummer Boy?

Some random Christmas musings from my mildly cynical wife, Nicole ...

"This morning to my great horror I was humming that Drummer Boy carol ... This might have to do with the outstanding job that our creative arts team did with it at our recent Christmas production. As I was contemplating my fallen state of singing Christmas carols, I realised how weird some songs are ... A Drummer Boy ... In the middle east ... dressed in stripes and all????

Ok, let’s get past that hurdle ... to the fact that he is drumming down the streets of Bethlehem at around midnight? He would never have made it to the stable alive. I'm sure he would have been stoned (semi-automatics were not around at that time, despite the militant theology of some Christians).

Anyway, he makes it to the stable. Mary and Joseph have just gotten rid of the pesky wise guys and now here comes a ... drummer boy! Joseph rolls his eyes. Mary adjusts her halo and smiles ... sweetly. The baby has just settled, everyone is frazzled from the events and the drummer boy wants to ... START DRUMMING!!

The animals go hysterical. There is bellowing, baaing, and growling (the inn keeper’s dog wasn’t going to miss out on the entertainment). The baby begins to wake up, and unlike all popular choruses, screams his lungs out. Joseph grabs the broom and is about to beat the living daylights out of the drummer boy, but Mary gives him a stern, matriarchal look, pulls herself together and nods through clenched teeth at the time-traveling drummer boy. He begins a rendition of “God save the King”. Everyone stares in disbelief, then Joseph ushers him out of the stable, patting him on the back, and encourages him not to call ... they’ll call him ... on their new Nokia ... from the wise guys!"

Merry Christmas everyone!

What Would Jesus Say to Santa Claus?

Have you noticed that Santa Claus has gradually been taking centre stage at Christmas of late and that Jesus has been forced to take more of a back seat?

Who is this Santa guy and where did he come from?

Christmas is the most widely celebrated holiday in Western world. It was Pope Gregory that established December 25th a the supposed birth of Christ. "Christmas" literally means "mass of Christ". Christians after the time of Constantine converted a number of pagan festivals, adding Christian elements to them. To the December winter solace and various harvest festivities, they added a nativity crib and the singing of Christmas carols. Eventually, the Santa Claus image emerged - with sled, reindeer, and a sack of toys. It was an American invention that first appeared in a 1868 drawing. However, the Father Christmas legend was based somewhat on a fourth century bishop by the name of Saint Nicholas.

So anyway ... what would Jesus say to Santa Claus? Here's what I think he might say ...

1. Thanks for encouraging the spirit of giving (yes, I think Jesus would have something positive to say to Santa Claus). We live in a world of increasing selfishness. Christmas is a time when we think more about others, which is a good thing. Like God, we all need to adopt more of a giving attitude in life, as well as one of gratitude, affirmation, and encouragement.

2. True fulfillment is not found in things. Santa’s focus at this time of year is based on a belief that more things will make people happier. But people need more than mere things. Things may be nice but ultimately they are empty and they never fully satisfy. We need love, peace, and joy that only God can provide through a relationship with him and with other people. Love people and use things - not the other way around.  

3. Good works aren't enough. Santa's game is one of getting rewarded for what you do - for being nice rather than naughty. The truth is that none of us are ever good enough. Our efforts fall short. That's why Jesus came - to live and then to die for our short-comings ... and then to offer us eternal life ... as a free git, not as a reward for our good deeds. Christmas is not about what we have done but about what God has done for us ... in Christ.

4. You're not the reason for the season. Christmas is about Christ. Jesus came to earth as the Saviour of world. He is the eternal Son of God who arrived on earth 2000 years ago. Santa Claus is a recent addition, an add on. This celebration isn’t about him. Jesus Christ is the most influential person in history. We mark time by his very arrival. Jesus is the "hinge of history". Let's keep the "Christ" in Christmas. Remember, HE is the real reason for season!

5. You're not real, but I am. Santa Claus is a figment of people’s imagination, a mythical hero. Sorry kids, but Santa isn’t real (parents, ease it to them slowly!). He's merely a character - like Mickey Mouse or Buzz Light Year. Jesus is real. You can’t see him but he is alive. He is not a myth or a legend or an imaginary person. He is not only real, but he’ll be back. However, his second coming won't be like his first coming. He will come in power and glory and every eye will see him.

Can you see that the Gospel of Jesus is quite different than gospel of Santa Claus? Where’s your faith? In Santa Claus or Jesus Christ? Jesus is knocking at door of your heart. Do you have room for Jesus? I believe that he is the true and living God, the Prince of Peace, the Saviour of the world, offering us forgiveness and real life. Turn to him and place your faith in him today. Follow him and live for him.

Christians: don't picket Santa Claus. Don't become an old scrooge or a humbug Christian. Just because Santa is an anagram for Satan doesn't mean that he is the devil! Jesus Christ is the true meaning of Christmas. Let's bring him back to centre stage!

Christmas Humour

A funny Christmas story ...

Terri asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their favourite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Kyle’s picture, which showed four people on an airplane, so she asked him which story it was meant to represent.

"The flight to Egypt," said Kyle.

"I see … and that must be Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus," Ms Terri said. "But who’s the fourth person?"

"Oh, that’s Pontius – the Pilot!"

The Christmas Season

In a few days we will celebrate Christmas together.

The early Christians did not celebrate the birth of Jesus and Jesus never asked them to. They focused on his death and resurrection, as well as his promised return. Christmas Day as it is celebrated today did not begin until the fourth century. Interestingly enough, Jesus was most likely born in October not December. Shepherds don't have their sheep out in the December snow in the northern hemisphere!

Many of today’s Christmas traditions (including Santa Claus and Christmas trees) have nothing to do with the message of Christ as portrayed in the Gospels. Nevertheless, it is a great time for Christians and the church to make the most of the opportunity to focus on the coming of Jesus Christ to earth as a baby born in Bethlehem.

No other person has influenced the world like Jesus Christ. Let’s worship him together and make him known this Christmas season.

P.S. For an interesting article on the increasing secularisation of Christmas by Barney Zwartz, the religion editor for The Age, click here.

Move On

Have you ever been to a really bad movie? I’m sure you have. Did you go see it again? Of course not! Did you buy the DVD? Come on ... Why would you watch through something you didn’t like all over again! That would be silly.

But in reality that’s something we all do from time to time. Have you ever done something you regretted? Have you ever had someone really hurt you? Did you find yourself replaying it over and over again in your mind? Some people even replay it in high definition ... in surround sound ... and even in slow motion! In doing so, they relive all of the negative emotions and bring the hurtful situation to life all over again.

Don’t do that. Don’t live in the past. Don’t replay things that you regret or things that were hurtful. Forgive yourself and forgive others ... then move on. Don’t live in the past. Don’t relive the pain. You can let go. Yes, it was bad. Yes, it was wrong ... but you don’t have to replay it over and over again. Focus on today ... and what’s coming in the future.

Move on – think about it.

Beliefs

All of us experience adversity in one form or another on a regular basis. We respond to adversity by thinking about it. Those thoughts rapidly form beliefs and these beliefs have consequences – in how we feel and what we do next.

A simple example: Your best friend hasn’t returned your phone calls. In response you think ... “They don’t like me anymore; maybe I did something to offend them.” As a result you are fairly depressed all day and you don’t get much work done

Or imagine the same event ... but this time in response you think ... “They’re probably flat out and haven’t had a chance to call back.” As a result you feel fine and you have a productive day.

Can you see that the adversity is not the issue - it is what you believe about it that matters most!

We need to tune in on the internal dialogue that takes place in our minds. We need to dispute our beliefs and ensure that they are in line with reality. After all, our beliefs have a strong and direct influence on how we feel and the actions we take.

Beliefs – think about it.

Happiness

 

We live in a world where the pursuit of happiness is most people’s highest endeavour. Everyone wants to feel good, to have positive emotions, and to avoid negative ones.

 Studies on the subject of happiness have found that:

1. Most people have a set range of happiness that they will return to even after good or bad things happen to them.
2. Most external circumstances don’t have a long-lasting impact on personal happiness – including matters such as money, marriage, health, or education.

What makes the biggest difference in an individual’s level of happiness is a number of voluntary actions that they can take ... including ...

1. Gratitude – being thankful for the people and things in your life
2. Forgiveness – learning to let go and release the hurts and regrets of the past.
3. Serving – doing something for the benefit of another person
4. Hope – having a future that excites you and is worth looking forward to

How is your happiness level? Are you waiting for someone or something to make you happy? It’s probably not going to happen. You are probably about as happy as you ever will be ... unless you take some actions to change it.

Happiness – think about it.

Problems

Problems – no one likes them but the truth is that everyone has them. I use to think that the aim in life was to have no problems at all ... but then I discovered that as soon as I solved one set of problems, some new ones would arrive on my doorstep. After a while I came to accept that problems are part of life. The crucial thing is not avoid them or to ignore them but to face them head on – with courage and wisdom.

Often when problems arise we tend to immediately focus on why they have happened or who caused them. These are important issues but they can easily get us caught up in the blame game or a victim mentality. A better way is to get on the solution side by saying, “Okay, we have this problem – what are we going to do about it? Focus your primary energy on solving the problem – for everyone’s benefit.

The issue in life is not whether you have problems or not but what you are doing about them. Problems can destroy us if we let them or they can be stepping stones to help us become stronger and better people.

Problems – think about it.

Clarity in Uncertainty

Today we all live in fairly turbulent times. There is a lot of uncertainty and that can bring all sorts of fears and worries into our life if we aren’t careful.

One of things you’ll discover in life is that you can’t always be certain but you can be clear. Uncertainty is a permanent part of our lives. It never goes away. We all have to at times make decisions with limited information. So our goal should not be to eliminate uncertainty. Instead, it should be to ensure we develop the art of clarity.

On a sports team, can you be certain of the outcome of the game. Of course not, but you can be clear about what you are trying to achieve.

In business, can you be certain of the economic environment over the next year. Of course not, but you can be clear about the service or product you have to offer and who your market is.

In life, can you be certain about your future? Of course not, but you can be clear – about who you are, what is important to you, and what you are going to give your life to pursue.

Clarity – think about it.

Border Control

I have been privileged to have traveled to a number of other nations now and every time I enter a country I have to go through customs or ‘border control’. Before they let you in, they want to know lots of things such as: who you are, why you are visiting, how long you are staying, and what you are bringing in with you.

I have often thought what it would be like to have such good border control for our mind and our inner world. After all, our life is shaped by our thoughts. Every day we have all sorts of thoughts trying to get into our mind. They come from everywhere. Like birds flying over our head we can’t stop them – but we can stop them making a nest in our hair!

Thoughts are very powerful, as are images. Think about what you let into your mind. Get a good border control in place. Take every thought captive and check it out before you let it in. Ask some key questions: Is this true? Is it beneficial? Or is it dangerous?

Remember: what you feed grows and what you starve dies.

Border control – think about it.

One Seed

A few years back, one of our church's young adults, Craig Mawdsley, started a ministry called One Seed.

The goal of this ministry is ... "to empower people living in developing nations to overcome poverty in a sustainable way through starting small businesses."

One Seed is now starting to see is not just the meeting of basic poverty needs (such as food, water and shelter) but a restoration of dignity for people - life becoming worth something, as well as a chance for people to dream and hope often for the very first time.

See below for a few stories ...

Why not log on to the One Seed web site and consider supporting this excellent ministry through buying some Christmas presents through their on-line store. This will really make a difference in the life of a poor and needy person.

Thanks forgiving this consideration.

Apostles of Fear

I am currently reading a recently released book by Morag Zwartz entitled Apostles of Fear. It is a tragic story about a number of events that have taken place over the years in two related churches: Melbourne Christian Fellowship (formerly called "Immanuel") and Brisbane Christian Fellowship, under the leadership of Vic Hall. The injustices done to so many people over so many years needs bringing to the light and confronting appropriately.

My dad, Kevin Conner, was involved in Immanuel (now Melbourne Christian Fellowship) in the very early years. Ray Jackson was the leader of the church at the time and after becoming aware of some of the immorality taking place, my dad confronted Ray directly. Unfortunately, Ray did not respond and he began to shut my dad down and eventually excommunicated him from the church. My dad continued to help people as he was able but was basically cut off from the church.

Our family moved to the USA in 1971 where we lived for 10 years. When we returned in 1981 we became involved with Richard Holland and Waverley Christian Fellowship (now CityLife Church). By this time Richard had cut off all relationship with Immanuel. Essentially, my dad has had nothing much to do with Immanuel since 1971.

Morag had a brief meeting with my dad and I while doing research for her book. Unfortunately, because my dad didn’t know Morag, he chose not to say very much at all to her about his experiences with Immanuel. As a result, Morag ends up shedding a fairly negative light on my dad and his perceived lack of action in confronting issues within this church. Due to people such as my dad not saying much to Morag (I now wish he had), she makes a number of unsubstantiated claims in her book and she lacks some of the details needed to paint a complete picture of what actually took place, especially during the early years of this group in Melbourne.

What I do know is that my dad has been very saddened by the developments that have taken place in Immanuel after his departure and the many people who have been hurt. He believes that he did all he could at the time in confronting Ray Jackson and he has helped as many people who have left as he has been able to.

Hopefully, this book will be a wakeup call against all forms of abusive leadership within any church, a leadership style which is so un-Christlike. I pray it will also encourage those within cultic groups characterised by fear, manipulation, and control to leave and to know that there is hope and healing available for them.

Thanks for your comments

P.S. I have just finished reading the book (17/12/08). Morag has done a good job of exposing the abuse and theological errors of this group. The extreme authoritarianism and intrusion into families that she writes about, especially at BCF, is just awful. Having left 'Immanuel' in Melbourne when I was 10 years old, I have had no direct experience with them as a group since then, although I have heard similar stories of people who have left MCF. It is a very sad story overall and I trust that the book will help bring these people to account, help those who are still trapped in this cult, and give hope and healing to those who have already left.

[Refer also to my other posts on: Spiritual Abuse]

7 Things To Do Before Christmas (Pt.7)

7. Plan Your Holiday.

Hopefully, you're planning on taking some time off around Christmas and the New Year.

Do something different and make it your best holiday yet.

Shut down, turn off, and enjoy your God, your friends, and your family.

I'm sure you have lots to do before Christmas, but hopefully these seven suggestions will be of benefit to you as you finish this year. All the best!

7 Things To Do Before Christmas (Pt.6)

6. Get Organised.

Clean your office. Make an appointment with yourself. Block out plenty of time for this.

Sort through any filing cabinets, shelves, or desk drawers.

Clean out your email folders.

Throw away as much as possible.

Get your 2009 diary or calendar up to date.

You'll feel much better for it!

 

7 Things To Do Before Christmas (Pt.5)

5. Do Some Pastoral Care.

If you are a leader of other people, take a few moments to reflect on the 'people flow' in your area.

Here are a few questions to ask:

• Who are the interested people who need hope and a vision?
• Who are the new people who need a welcome and some clear direction?
• Who are the core people who need some encouragement and affirmation at this time?
• Who are the disgruntled people who you need to take some time to listen to and help work through some issues that are important to them?
• Who are the people who have dropped out who you may need to go after and see how they are?

Are there any tensions or unresolved conflicts in your world? Make an effort to address and resolve them right away. Make it a priority. Tie up any loose ends before the year finishes so you can start with a clean slate.

7 Things to Do Before Christmas (Pt.4)

4. Do Some Planning for 2009.

Think about some of your main events or activities for next year. What's happening with - your life, your family, your friends, your work, and your church? 

Start doing some planning and organisation for the first quarter of the year.

Create some personal life goals for 2009. What would you be excited to have accomplished by the end of the year? What are you passionate about?

How about planning some holidays too! There's something energising about just planning some time off or away.

7 Things To Do Before Christmas (Pt.3)

3. Strengthen Your Team.

All of us do life, work, and ministry with other people. We are all part of some sort of team, maybe even as a leader of a team.

Spend some extra time with these important people before Christmas.

• Encourage them and express appreciation to them for who they are and how they have benefited your life. Remember, encouragement is like oxygen to the soul - we all need lots of it.
• Give them feedback on what they have done well.
• If you are a leader, coach people on your team a little by sharing some ways they can grow or improve.
• Talk about the future. What is the vision that you are passionate about seeing become a reality?

December is a busy time. Don't get caught up in only the things that YOU need to do. Be aware of the people around you. Connect and relate to them even more intentionally during this time. Finish the year well together.

7 Things To Do Before Christmas (Pt.2)

2. Evaluate Your Own Personal Effectiveness.

What are your priorities? Are you using your time to accomplish them?

How is the balance of your life? Consider areas such as your spiritual life, your family and friendships, your energy level, as well as your social and recreation life.

How is your joy? Your enthusiasm? Your love for people? Your vision?

How much are you growing personally? What new things would you like to learn? What training could you consider for next year? 

Take some time to think about your life and plan any necessary changes or adjustments for the coming year.

7 Things To Do Before Christmas (Pt.1)

We are into December now and it's only a few weeks before Christmas. I'm sure you've got a lot to do this month and the last thing you think you probably need is another list! But I thought I'd share with you seven things that would be good to do before Christmas comes - which I shared with some of our church staff recently.

1.    Evaluate Your Ministry or Career.

Take some time to think about how the various areas of life that you are involved in are going.

What's going well? What's not? Where are you heading?

Think about next year - 2009.

What needs to change? What do you need to do differently?  What do you need to do more of ... or less of?